New Year’s resolutions are notoriously hard to keep. Part of the reason is that January 1st is an arbitrary time to make life decisions. Deciding to divorce, however, is one of the most important life decisions you’ll ever make.
There are benefits to using your divorce as a chance to look at what works and doesn’t work in your life. Consider your divorce a resolution to get the fresh start you deserve.
Embrace Your New Reality
The longer you’re married, the more your life can be defined by that partnership. You might feel like a couple, rather than an individual. It’s easy to lose track of friends, family, and even your own identity during a long marriage.
Divorce can be an opportunity to reclaim the people and things that matter most to you. This can be daunting, particularly if you were happy to let your former spouse manage your social calendar. Still, you may find it refreshing not to have to hang out with some of your ex-partner’s friends or relatives. Who you spend your time with is now up to you.
Let Go of What’s Holding You Back
Bitterness and anger are two emotions that many people feel toward their former spouses. While these feelings are natural, they’re unlikely to improve your present or future. You can be realistic with yourself about who your former spouse really was without poisoning your life with negative emotions. Your happiness and well-being are what matter now.
Brighter Days Are Ahead
Life is always better when you have something you’re moving toward. Moving away from your past relationship isn’t enough. You need goals or some kind of destination to set your sights on.
A divorce is a perfect excuse to pick up a new hobby or resurrect an old one. Whether your goal is self-improvement or pure entertainment, a divorce can give you the freedom to pursue something that your marriage may have hindered. Trying something new can open your eyes to the possibilities ahead.
If your divorce is still weighing on you heavily, you should consider seeking counseling or other forms of support. Moving forward after a divorce can be a struggle in more ways than one. The New Year is still an arbitrary starting point, so you shouldn’t feel guilty if you’re not yet ready to focus on the future, rather than the past.